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Rix Quinn’s Minute Story: Dating

Rix Quinn by Rix Quinn
May 14, 2021
in Columnists, Commentary, Opinion, Satire/Comedy
Reading Time: 2 mins read
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I often eat lunch with a group of downtown buddies. Last meeting, we discussed our dating years.

Some of these guys are currently unmarried, but not by choice. A few of them have something to offer a lady, but others might be disqualified from reputable dating sites.

An uncle told me I should compliment each person who went out with me, but that wasn’t always easy. One girl had really bad halitosis, so I told her I always admired people who carried breath mints.

When I was single, I dated several girls…but not intentionally. Many would not agree to a second date.

I have no idea why. I treated those ladies with the greatest respect. I took them to the best meals I could find for under $10.

I had one huge advantage. I have incredibly common features. I look like somebody you met at a party whose name you might forget.

People constantly ask me, “Don’t I know you?” My usual reply is, “No, but you may know my brother.”

For some reason, a few restaurants in town gave me free meals because I looked like a neighbor, a preacher, or the restaurant owner’s cousin. Those were the places I took dates.

When I met a woman willing to go out with me more than twice – and willing to eat in the restaurants that gave me food – I would ask her to be my girlfriend.

Some of my buddies had much odder experiences. One guy got married, got divorced, then married his ex-wife’s sister. Today, he’s also uncle to his children, and his first wife’s brother-in-law.

And my vegetarian friend got engaged last year to a lady who owned a poultry farm, but at the last minute he chickened out.

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Rix Quinn
Website | + posts

Rix Quinn is a former magazine publisher who works as an independent biographer and broadcaster.

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